Performance Reviews That Don’t Make Everyone Cringe
I was sitting with a business owner not too long ago who said, “Kath, we’ve got performance reviews coming up… and honestly, everyone dreads them. Including me.”
And I get it.
For a lot of teams, performance reviews feel like a box-ticking exercise. Something you have to do, rather than something that actually helps. Managers feel awkward. Employees feel judged. And at the end of it all, not much really changes.
If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. But it doesn’t have to be that way.
When done well, performance reviews can be one of the most valuable conversations you have with your team. The key is shifting how you think about them.
Here’s what I’ve learned works in practice.
1. Stop treating reviews like a once-a-year event
One of the biggest issues I see is businesses putting all the weight on a single annual review.
It builds pressure. It creates nerves. And it often leads to surprises - which is the last thing you want.
If someone is hearing important feedback for the first time in a formal review, something’s already off.
What works better is thinking of performance reviews as a summary, not the main event.
That means:
Regular check-ins throughout the year
Ongoing feedback (both positive and constructive)
Conversations that feel normal, not formal
When you do this, the review itself becomes a much calmer, more productive conversation. It’s just joining the dots, not dropping a bomb.
2. Make it a two-way conversation (not a report card)
This is where a lot of reviews fall flat.
The manager talks. The employee listens. Maybe they nod politely. And that’s about it.
But performance isn’t one-sided and your review process shouldn’t be either.
Some of the most valuable insights I’ve seen have come when leaders simply asked:
“What’s working well for you right now?”
“Where are you feeling stuck?”
“What do you need more (or less) of from me?”
It shifts the dynamic completely.
I worked with a team where one employee shared during a review that they felt unclear about priorities - not because they weren’t capable, but because things kept changing without context. That conversation alone led to small changes in communication that made a big difference to their performance.
Sometimes, it’s not about capability. It’s about clarity.
3. Focus on what actually matters
Another trap is trying to cover everything.
Long forms. Endless criteria. Ratings that no one really understands.
It becomes overwhelming and, honestly, not that useful.
Instead, keep it focused on what genuinely drives performance in your business:
Key outcomes and results
How the person shows up (behaviours, values, teamwork)
Growth and development
You don’t need a complicated framework to have a meaningful conversation.
In fact, simpler is usually better.
If your managers can clearly answer:
What’s this person doing well?
Where can they improve?
What’s next for them?
You’re already in a good place.
4. Be honest - but human
This is the part many leaders find hardest.
There’s often a tendency to soften feedback to avoid discomfort… or swing the other way and be overly blunt.
Neither works particularly well.
What I always come back to is this: you can be honest and respectful at the same time.
For example:
Instead of avoiding a performance issue, name it clearly
Explain the impact, not just the behaviour
Work together on what improvement looks like
I remember a conversation with a manager who was hesitant to address a team member’s missed deadlines. When we unpacked it, they were worried about damaging the relationship.
But once they approached it with curiosity rather than blame - “I’ve noticed deadlines have been slipping, what’s going on from your side?” - it opened up a completely different discussion.
The employee was juggling competing priorities and didn’t feel comfortable pushing back. Once that was on the table, they could actually fix the problem.
Honesty builds trust when it’s handled well.
5. Make it forward-looking, not just reflective
Too many reviews get stuck in the past.
Yes, it’s important to reflect on what’s happened - but the real value is in what comes next.
A good performance conversation should leave someone clear on:
What they’re continuing to do
What they’re working on improving
What opportunities are ahead
This doesn’t need to be a big, formal development plan.
Sometimes it’s as simple as:
Taking on a new project
Building a specific skill
Having more visibility in the business
The key is that it feels relevant and achievable - not something that gets written down and forgotten.
6. Ditch the “perfect” process
This might be a slightly unpopular take, but I’ll say it anyway.
There is no perfect performance review template.
I see businesses spend a lot of time trying to get the form, the rating scale, or the wording just right… and miss the bigger point.
It’s not the template that makes the conversation meaningful - it’s how it’s delivered.
You’re far better off with a simple structure and a confident, thoughtful manager than a complex system that no one really understands.
If your process feels clunky, overwhelming or forced, it’s worth stepping back and asking:
Is this helping or getting in the way?
Often, less really is more.
Wrapping it up
Performance reviews don’t have to be something your team dreads.
When you take the pressure off, keep things simple, and focus on real conversations, they can actually become something people value.
It’s about:
Ongoing feedback, not one-off events
Two-way conversations, not one-sided assessments
Clarity, honesty and a focus on what’s next
If you get those pieces right, the “cringe” factor tends to disappear.
And more importantly, you start to see real shifts in how your team shows up and grows.
If you’re looking at your current approach and thinking it might need a reset, I’m always happy to chat it through.
Sometimes a few small changes can make a big difference.
